Have you ever been stuck in a thought process that you know has holes in it and lack the perspective to flesh it out and move on? I’ll be honest, I’m there a lot! I have a few tricks I use to get my thoughts out of my head in hopes of making sense of them while they are laid bare in front of me, but sometimes that’s not enough. I need an outside perspective. I need someone to exact transformational influence in my own mind and thought process.
In my experience there are 3 ingredients needed for transformational influence to take place: Time (exposure), Accessibility (access), and Credibility (proven knowledge and track record). If there are any one of these 3 missing, it can be terribly frustrating.
Here is how I think this rolls out when you’re missing one ingredient.
Time & Accessibility
Having a history with someone whom you have regular access to equates to a buddy. This is the person you’ve known for many years and you have regular interactions with, they don’t, however, carry much credibility.
Accessibility & Credibility
Having access to someone with credibility, whom you don’t have a history with equates to a skeptical reference. You haven’t known this person long enough to fully trust them, but you have access to them on an as needed basis and they carry a lot of credibility.
Credibility & Time
A credible source who has a longstanding history equates to a trusted reference. This credible source has been a knowledge expert in their field for many years, but you don’t have direct or immediate access to them.
So, if you are stuck on something (like I often am), maybe it is related to work, family, community involvement, a spiritual matter, or whatever, here is what I’ve learned to do; seek someone who has all three ingredients. Make it a point to find that person, and if s/he is a newcomer to your circle of influence, put the time in that is need to build the trust.